subtitles

July 6, 2005

Mia Kirshner is supposed to be the new, Jewish, Charlotte Coleman

Charlotte Coleman really is so adorable and insolent in Oranges, very much inhabitant.

Now we know where the L Word got it's carnival imagery from. Mia Kirshner is supposed to be the new, Jewish, Charlotte Coleman.

The series itself is whatever, particularly sparkly because of her, but otherwise a little unremarkable. Perhaps it's been spoilt by my having watched the stage adaptation in York. Makes me wonder at the source material, since it was adapted by her anyway.

Posted by subtitles at 9:36 PM | Comments (2)

You Suck One Cock...

It's just funny beyond words. And Dylan Moran is just spanky. It's like Charlotte Coleman has a whole new lease. The intro music alone makes you want to weep.

Posted by subtitles at 3:09 AM

July 5, 2005

How Do You Want Me?

I've just been watching it, and there's something about the music and the setting that is just moving beyond words. And Charlotte Coleman is so very very heartbreakingly beautiful. The cast anyway is wonderful, though this makes me ache for the first series, and really to watch more Simon Nye.

Dylan Moran is great, as is Peter Serafinowichz - I really should go watch Shaun of the Dead. Mark Heap as well.

The fact that she died after, the idea that it might have been so horrible a death, almost beggars belief.

Posted by subtitles at 1:37 AM

July 2, 2005

Sharapova Getting Spanked - Tabitha - Opera McFlurry

I suppose I could write about Opera, but I've just not been in the mood. Something about the flurry of releases just strikes me as Opera overcompensating for Nokia chucking them for Apple. So there, stunning insight just for the people who subscribe here instead of just monitoring the aggregator.

But yes, Sharapova seems particularly alluring getting spanked by Venus. Even when she was being rolled over by Henin she didn't have that same air of grasping determination. It's probably not wrong to think that her appeal is similar to Zhang Ziyi's, which, as I've said before, seems incumbent on her being made to look thwarted and vexed in that very pursed manner.

Speaking of the shapely, I've been watching the much maligned and ill-fated Tabitha - the Bewitched spin-off that died after half a season. I remember watching an episode a long time ago and finding Lisa Hartley no end of fetching. From what I'm seeing now, it's another of those series that rightly has that attraction of ill fate.

Lindsey Davenport playing Kim Clijsters was quite a sight as well.

Posted by subtitles at 3:33 AM

June 30, 2005

The Inside: the fluttering flag over the fence

I obviously feel my weekly posts about The Inside can get a bit repetitious, but I can't tell you enough, how after last week's less than fantastic episode, this week's was spectacularly on the mark. The character interactions within the team were particularly wonderful this week, all of them. And very very very funny. "Cuz that's what I do".

But yes, Jane Espenson episode, which begs the question who did the very similar episode in Angel. Nanny from Wonderfalls is the featured guest, which turns out well. Their problematic endings are a particular weakness, but the episode was still very good, if only because the interplay of the characters' dialogue was wonderful. And the fluttering flag over the fence. "Either one of you? No."

They're lighting Rachel Nichols differently, more harshly I think, which is probably their assuredly subtle way of signalling her role in the episode.

TorrentSpy is your friend. I'm not sure, but I get the feeling that the ratings did, at least marginally, better. Apparently I was wrong, it's more or less been holding steady at what's considered a non-competitive dismal.

Posted by subtitles at 6:04 PM

June 27, 2005

Glut of Preview Screeners For Fall TV

I must have somehow missed all this stuff, or I'm just on the wrong feed. All of which is untrue, because for some reason the categories in ISOHunt aren't definitive when it comes to indexing this stuff, apparently - either that or they were hiding somehow, because they didn't show up on TorrentSpy, much to their chagrin. Which is all the more annoying, since these are all on prominent trackers/aggregators, like Piratebay, or Mininova.

Anyway, here's a list of the shows, most of which can be found searching through TV.com, or sheer ingenuity:

The Loop, Still Life, The Robinsons Lost In Space, Reunion, Just a Phase, Bones, Rocky Point, Prison Break, Supernatural, Everybody Hates Chris, Like Cats and Dogs, Out of Practise.

Torrents for you to torrent with can be found this convenient ISOHunt search results page.

Posted by subtitles at 9:45 PM

June 24, 2005

The Chills of Dave Gorman

I can't tell you how wonderful it is, this thing I've just watched. It's cosmically and artistically breathtaking, and it's also unerringly funny. I can't stress enough to you how blown away I was at watching this. I got it off UKNova, but you might want to try these off TorrentSpy, though I can't be sure they're the right ones.

The premise would just sound silly if I told it to you, but if you must you can search for it online, I think the search will really just augment the experience.

I'm telling you, really, watch this, you won't regret it. I haven't watched the subsequent episodes yet, but as with so many things, within the first couple of minutes or seconds, I knew, from that tiny sample, that this is something was wonderful, that I would want to watch, and that I would watch.

Posted by subtitles at 9:10 AM

June 23, 2005

The Inside - You Can Still Catch Up

Now that I've got the drama that is Opera out of my system I can get back to the joyful act of writing about The Inside.

This episode wasn't quite as good as the others so far. That said, there are some things that are intensely enjoyable about it, not least Katie Finneran and Adam Baldwin getting very very gratifying moments.

And of course a post cannot go by without my mentioning how lovingly the show presents Rachel Nichols - though in this episode it wasn't quite as fluent, and wasn't quite as rigorous as it has been. Much too much of a concept episode - particularly in establishing the premise of the show - but those are normally the episodes they just have to get out of their system before they move on.

Whatever it is, if you're not already watching it, you must be waiting for me to mercilessly mock you into doing so. Anyway, I like making things just that bit easier, so even if you've missed the first two, you can still catch up.

Edit: Apparently the ratings aren't getting any better, basically getting creamed by Dancing With The Stars, and below even that of the reruns. I don't know what it bodes, but they're showing back to back episodes of it next week, July 6th.

Posted by subtitles at 3:21 PM | Comments (9)

June 22, 2005

Nigella on HIGNFY

Honestly it had been the reason I actually got the whole wodge that got shoved, and well worth it. Nigella really is so very fetching, so very tartly regal in her minxy saucy manner. It must have been that period when those shirts were in vogue, since she was stretching out Delia's name. She didn't really say that much, but she looked so very focused and determined, and not a bit defensive, not a bit conservative. I suppose wafts of antipathy encourage those things. Very much the face of a younger conservatism, desiring not to suffer fools.

And she really does look like - :D. Less disperse, one would suspect.

It really was quite enjoyable, very squeal-worthy.

Posted by subtitles at 11:01 PM

June 18, 2005

Heidi-Ho - The Lovely Jewel Staite.

The Jewel Staite episodes of Wonderfalls are probably the best arc in the series; of course excepting the couple of good stand alone episodes, like the Tim Minear episode (obviously the best of the lot), and perhaps the Destroy Her one. The Bryan Fuller portions make me suspicious - the portions that are Minear are more convincing to me. Not that I don't like the family, but some times what's done with them is less than subtle.

All will greatly look forward to Jewel's upcoming hurrah as Kaylee in Serenity.

What's up with "moist"? Particularly fun seeing Jaye wrestling with Heidi. Both are particularly fetching in the period. For those that don't quite get it, Bryan Fuller also did the occasionally good series Dead Like Me.

A post, especially one that mentions Tim Minear, cannot go by without mention of The Inside. As I have now done.

Posted by subtitles at 9:27 PM

New TV Site That Works With Azureus' RSS Plugin

Calls itself, and tags its files, as CTV - though the url is http://centraltracker.org/. Importantly, it has The Inside, so yay. If you need me to explain what Azureus is, or what a plugin is, what the RSS plugin is, or what RSS is - then god help you, I'll bash your fucking skull in. The feed url is http://centraltracker.org/rss/index.php.

Obviously The Inside has made me much more receptive to my rewatching of Wonderfalls.

Posted by subtitles at 8:30 PM

June 16, 2005

The Descriptive Wonder of: The Inside's Second *Incredible* Episode

I'm sort of breathless from the second episode of The Inside. It was a really really good episode - probably one of the best directed I've seen of the genre that I can remember. Honestly, Quentin Tarantino should bury his head in his hands and trundle off with his hands, just dried. I've either not posted about what I refer to, or I've just hidden it too well - if you remember, please.

I just can't help but not want to over-sell it, but as I said to Su-lin, I *really* like it - I want it to be fluffy so I can hug it - kind of like it. In many ways much more paced and momentous (in the best way possible) than the pilot, perhaps another case of the creator being unable to work beyond his premise - like Joss needing Tim to step in. But yes, strangely for me, I really appreciated the significance of the exchanges, the focus and import. Unfortunately the elusiveness of the case was defeated in an annoyingly trite manner of closing, but I'm sure that's something they can work on. I mean even X-Files knew better than to give you more than you needed. And in this case, they decided to write past the significance - they just can't seem to be happy with the ambivalence and puzzlement, they have to sketch. But it was still a significant try that I really liked. Another one of my very favorite time/perception ellipses/replays. And the manner of her erotic replay. And the spectacle of her screams was thrilling in a way that went beyond gratification.

Rachel Nichol does so very very well, and acts so very very fetchingly. And the glimpses you get to see of the other cast members is wonderfully suggestive. Webb will be their downfall if they don't handle it.

And a very very good teaser, and some of the most evocative and appropriately toned titles I've ever seen. I just wonder how they managed to get the cast to go along with the whole change of premise, and perhaps how they managed to retain any cast at all in it. High School and control would have been a much tougher fit.

She really does do so very well.

Via Bittorrent, via TorrentSpy, via VTV - by forming another tier of bureacracy.

Fox really needs to start double and tripling up, re-airing to seed - they can't let this die, not when its merit rivals that of the OQ, which they so assiduously challenged.

Posted by subtitles at 5:19 PM

June 14, 2005

TVTome is Dead - TV.com Sucks - Long Live epguides.com

I can't stress enough how much suckage occurs with the "new" TV.com - CNet really knows how to fuck things up.

Anyway, that seems to have been the import of the sudden appearance of the CNet banner at the top of the TVTome pages, and now they can kiss their users goodbye.

As far as I'm concerned, epguides.com is a much much better, faster loading, stripped down version of TVTome, and now that I've rediscovered it, it strikes me that I should have moved ages ago.

The best things about epguides is that the episode listings are on the main page, so no navigating through menus to get where you want to go.

This way, you only really have to put up with TV.com when you're looking at episode details, which need not be often. Similarly with going to the main page for news.

epguides.com seems to work with a simple google search, which is more effective that I'd have thought.

My search.ini, when I update it, will put epguides.com in place of the old TVTome search. I'll probably include the TV.com search for completeness.

God damn those CNet bastards.

And so, as Rachel Nichols' pose suggests (her of the wonderful new show The Inside), we are not amused.

Posted by subtitles at 3:32 PM | Comments (3)

June 12, 2005

Dear Emily and Richard

I wonder if they were heading towards cancellation in the middle of the 3rd season, because the 13th episode seems incredibly seminal. And very moving, for those of us who paid attention, and recognise colour.

Posted by subtitles at 6:25 PM

June 10, 2005

The Inside - Watch It - Fox, Weds 9/8c

The pilot is available online, so you have no excuse. And given the ratings, I'm sure Fox won't mind, if it's to pimp the show. Apparently got it's ass handed to it by Dancing with the Stars, with I actually quite enjoy.

Anyway, The Inside is great - it's Executive Produced by Tim Minear, who worked on both Angel and Firefly (and X-Files before that), and also was the guy running Wonderfalls. He wrote my favorite episode of Firefly, Out of Gas, which stands alone wonderfully as a great piece of writing. I'm just hoping that given its summer status, it'll end up more like The OC than Wonderfalls. If not people are gonna start calling Tim "the Reaper" - which would be apt since Bryan Fuller (Dead Like Me) was creator of Wonderfalls.

The pilot probably isn't quite out of the park, but I find it wonderful for how much it reads like so much of Tim Minear's work. As far as I'm concerned, he can do very little wrong, or at least very little that I can't forgive.

Rachel Nichols is really superlatively lovely, and made to look so much like a prettier ringer for Jodie Foster. The most pleasant surprises are Adam Baldwin, Jayne from Firefly and Katie Finneran, Jaye's lesbian sister from Wonderfalls.

I mean I almost don't know what to say about how much I want to watch the series, how good I think it'll end up, and really how much I hope it doesn't get canceled. Hopefully Fox will have enough confidence in it that they'll do what they did, and keep repeating it over summer, so that it can build its audience.

Check out the official Fox site, and it's on Fox, Wednesdays 9/8c - best thing you'll see on TV all summer.

If you need convincing about Rachel Nichols, have a look at some lovely pictures of her from Maxim :). Of which my chosen teasers are these:

Posted by subtitles at 11:43 AM

June 2, 2005

Dumping Klipfolio, Using Opera for RSS, Kelly Brook

It's not really their fault, but now that I've figured out how to use views in M2 to do more or less a global "dismiss all items", Klipfolio suddenly seems a lot less indispensable. It's not quite as easy as hovering and clicking, but using the keypad to trawl through has it's advantages, as does opening in background pages etc. Can't do weather, which is annoying, but I really could just use Klipfolio for that :P.

Love is not love that alters when alteration finds.

I must say it is pretty, the new beta, but after awhile it gets a bit clunky - the problem is when it starts to actually look and feel a bit clunky. It is still the most attractive and innovative way to present feeds, but Opera is surprising me with its potential efficiency, and now a more ruthless kind of elegance. Though I'm sure I'll straddle the two for a while at least. I suppose what I should also do is have an email address just for listhost stuff, since I need an address anyway to activate my mail panel - an annoying workaround if I ever knew one.

I'm still very much against the lock-in of Opera's feeds - showing the url won't kill anyone - though I'm now really appreciating things being built in. Having problems getting Opera to recognise a .food file as a feed, shall have to remember to ask. Looks like I'm going to have to figure out how to transfer settings for M2 as well now.

I suppose what I should be saying is mo' features, mo' problems.

It's nice that I can use it for chat as well, though I think I still can't get beyond the desire for folders, so M2 as a mail client is gonna have to wait. Is it just me, or is it silly that there's not pure aggregated feed view - they could just put in in the root directory of "Newsfeeds".

And Starhub is really pissing me off that bandwidth really gets squeezed at primetime, starting from about 8. Allegedly.

I really don't think I'd ever smurf with the panel open though, having the mail window in the background should be enough. I'll see when the morning inundation comes. It's probably because of the end of the season, but I'm just too lazy to set up Azureus to batch download - though I suppose I'll end up bothering for the various summer series of note, not to mentions stuff like Celebrity Love Island.

I'm actually currently getting through the episodes of first season WetBoy with Kelly Brook in it. They probably needed external talent back then for all the languid bath shots. As in sermons in stones, and books in the running. But yes, DVD rips are really not as lovely as from hdtv, more pixelated if nothing else. Pissed-Off steak, nice pepper sauce.

I have since ameliorated my opinion of klipfolio 3, and reinstated it in a more limited capacity - for more information, see this post on the Serence forums.

Posted by subtitles at 1:01 PM

May 31, 2005

Death to the Demoness Allegra Geller

Good propect of a history of violence. Cookie cutter elements to be sure, but it all looks like it'll come together in the most wonderful way. The prominent actors even managed to be made to look normal. It's not eXistenz, but then what is.

A very loving portrait of fiona, and the deft unpretention of newsradio. Even the best of series some times fail to meet the level of attentive unsentimentality that NewRadio manages. And Maura Tierney turns so seductively.

Posted by subtitles at 8:18 AM | TrackBack

May 29, 2005

We Win

I must say this is a genuinely very sinister episode. I suppose it really does depend on who is doing the what. Repetition can end up getting a bit banal-ly annoying after a while, but still very jumpy scary.

Posted by subtitles at 4:18 PM

watch, something

And so a pathetic sentimentality. I really need to watch something, and soon, that contains things getting blown up, shot, and people getting smacked over the head and called jag-off. And so a very different kind of sentimentality.

Posted by subtitles at 12:04 PM

May 25, 2005

One-eyed Mia Kirshner

One-eyed Mia Kirshner is such an *actress*. Very effective though. Very much like a button. Probably the best thing on the show in a long while. It's really just about a deftness and force of movement, a kind of firmness and resolution.

I like the idea of vagrant Jack. They also pulled out his dissolute jacket for it, which is nice. Perhaps they're doing something professional.

Posted by subtitles at 8:42 AM

May 22, 2005

with a kind of cant, obviously

And so this is what feature directors do, they come in and they do what features do best - they find the premise and dig deep. And so basically what they're doing is what Sorkin does in his 2 hour season premieres, but in their own way, with a kind of cant, obviously. They immerse in the mythology, or the diegesis if you will, and distill the things that, so often repeated, or so resonant, they they come to become. I won't say exactly that they do another pilot, as I think I mistakenly said before; what they do is exaggerate, reflex, emphasise, amplify, deft subtle. Often not new - pivotal - but not necessarily new. So that even if important changing things occur, it still is a kind of suspension, a kind of disruption of the flow or tick of the cadence. It's like casting in amber, making it crystal, a kind of refraction.

Though part of the problem, of course, is that in doing this, even though it leads to generally better episodes, it still means that however good the directors and episodes may be, they are unable to transcend the show, its premise, and the limitations of the genre, cast, and feel. Though of course, in the best series, or even in good ones, they can become some of the most effective, sometimes all the more's the pity for the after.

Jorja Fox has ceased to be any kind of attractive. And I wanted him to die - all of them, really. Bastards all. No help or pity, to those less fortunate than ourselves.

Posted by subtitles at 3:43 AM

May 21, 2005

Their little drama - out of the island

Yeah, I basically can't quite stand my last post being on top, because it's absolutely horrendous writing - hence new post. Normally I do okay when I'm sleeping odd hours and never quite feel rested, but that must have been strange. Most of the time I just get disjointed rather than rubbish. And I felt awfully about having to spank the word into the title.

It's absolutely wonderful that Z-Nix is still getting in the Maxell discs - the quality is excellent, though I'm sure it could be cheaper. Considering how much they cost, I really should get a Benq drive, but the Lite-On's still fine, and the myth of scanning is always convincing. Anyway the bigger issue is with the inability of the spin to catch up, which is annoying in so many ways.

Is it hard to make arrangements with yourself?

I'm quite enjoying Celebrity Love Island, not least because of Abi Titmuss and Liz from Atomic Kitten. Their little drama is entertaining if a little flickery.

Movable Type really needs to take a couple of pages from WordPress, esp things like ticking multiple categories etc. But then I've still not migrated, and neither likely to, so.

I'm still feeling too competitive about Opera Blogs, but ah well. I think I'll try my best to keep at least a post or 2 on the latest page, that seems fair. More dark comedy regarding my phone, and much annoyance with forms.

Starhub has been acting up a bit recently, basically with the bandwidth

out of the island.

Posted by subtitles at 10:37 PM

May 20, 2005

Bleatney Looks Like She's Shooting Porn

Ok, that was a bit harsh, but what's the fun in having a name if people can't make fun of it in some way. And yes, the whole handheld things is very gonzo, but not annoyingly so. I think you have to fight the urge to read it all as being "real" - and the picture they obviously want to paint of Bristina as being "People Like Uz". And yes it does come across as making things out a bit sad and bereft. Not really quite as funny as Newlyweds, which I'd suppose to be the benchmark. Well at least this has a vital ingredients, big star (/to be) and washed up nobody husband. The asking of questions is interesting. And you wonder at the smacking of manipulative attention-sook and pathos.

Other titles could have included Bitch-ney POV. And he's got all the hallmarks of "man" - in that he looks like a dick.

I had to get it off filelist, since everyone else was bleating about how there aren't propers out.

An interventionist god.

I don't answer stupid questions. People who don't know anything ask questions that so lack the will towards conviction.

Not entirely unaware.

It's nice that it happened, in what looks appears to be Manchester. So that's why they call it pathetic fallacy, which is not exact. Man-Whore. Don't Know Much.

Posted by subtitles at 4:39 AM

May 19, 2005

Undeclared - Natalie Portman will have No Career

Another series that I wonder where it's been all my life. I hope to god that Judd Apatow can get back to doing stuff like this - that doesn't suck ass - now that 'piss as we gulp it' is died like it's dead.

I suppose it really helps that so many cast members from Freaks and Geeks show up. The only problem is the one of self-immolation, as covered elsewhere, not least about Peep Show, but at least that's not what this is "about". But yes, still plenty of dousing and shrieking. And woman who looks like cat-woman on CSI is endlessly charming. And the male cast is actually funny, and actually directed worth a damn.

And really, it's just so very very sweet and wavy.

And guess what? It sure beats (baby pops out) "Luke!" (another baby) "Leia!"

Posted by subtitles at 3:59 PM

May 18, 2005

unfortunately still referential - Penultimate House

And so House decided to do interesting things. To be honest I preferred the jumpy pumpy to the revelation, but who would have guessed, eh? I can't say it's the most innovative way of presentation, but it was okay - unfortunately still referential, but then most things are. It's always more fun to play than to play for a reason, though playing for a reason in roundy circles without saying uncle is as good a way as any. Is playing for playing another kind of roundy circle? I've not thankfully made myself lose all interest and find it all tedious.

And so they picked up on the odd ambivalence of Sela Ward's empathy. Are her eyebrows really like that? And so it occurs to me that as with so many times, I probably liked or thought I liked more than came out and chiseled.

I recommend for convenience the TorrentSpy.com directory. For House.

Posted by subtitles at 7:48 PM

*Evil* Mia Kirshner

24 is really starting to epitomise the quote, that thankfully I managed to find on Yahoo - "You call this a coronation? I call it bad comedy." But the presence of *sinister* Mia Kirshner, after her camped out depravity on the L Word makes her look aged. And Trey is on 24, who would have thought? And how what the hell is wrong with them that they decided to be so very wrong and so very what were they thinking.

Both 24 and Alias are *so* on my list. But she makes a very cute terrorist mercenary, as I think is the point. I wonder if Daisy Adair will ever re-appear. I can't believe I missed that many episodes of 2.5 Men, silly btefnet. And oh my, now they're pulling out before they spurt 101 all over the screen. Probably the will they/won't they of violence-enabled melodrama.

Really, the pure tonnage of people getting finagled into coming here via Google is oxen stunning. Oh, and one friendly person signed up for my tracker, hoorah.

You shot a 6 year old.

Posted by subtitles at 1:21 AM

May 17, 2005

...who showed everyone her penis?

Greg the Bunny is fucking hilarious, and is actually better than you'd ever expect. Makes you want to watch every series that got canceled summarily. And puts puppet Angel into perspective. Sarah Silverman, for being witchily annoying, does however turn out to be reasonably effective totty. They must have some kind of special thigh make-up.

Ranks up there with ...doesn't mean you have to do porn.

The vision of Risky Business.

I'm not quite sure what to make of h.264, seems nice. I'd have to compare.

And so also really rather moving, and effective, and talently done. The physical comedy alone is breathtaking.

Posted by subtitles at 7:45 AM

Lesbian Time

I wonder if the displacement (even if to the present) at the beginning of each episode is a gesture towards "female time" - or some other not-so-condescending way of putting it. Jig-lamps I think is the analogy. But it's the finale so I should pay attention. And stick to not posting till it's over.

I mean, okay, I admit to being a bit distracted, but I genuinely am pretty bored as well. I wonder if they're contractually obligated to show a certain amount of HLA every episode. Baby drama never helps.

Posted by subtitles at 4:58 AM | TrackBack

May 16, 2005

Mena Suvari and Maura Tierney - And He Brings A Gun To School

Mena Suvari really is rather charming in the Teenage Dirtbag video, it makes me almost want to watch Loser again, even though it really wasn't that much of anything, despite Amy Heckerling. Interesting in terms of her, but not so much in terms of the thing itself. The narrative of the video is really rather effective, and her doing the girl portion is particularly gratifying. Is anyone possibly surprised she's now a swinging divorcee?

Speaking of which, Maura Tierney is lovely all over again on NewsRadio - so fresh faced. And the theme music has an excited joy about it that moves me like a funny puppet. But-ta-FU-co.

Posted by subtitles at 10:20 AM | TrackBack

May 13, 2005

maybe not so much for you with the talking

I'm sure I've mentioned hit and run Josh/Dan before. The much charmingness of Mary Louise-Parker. I just like the arc of her initial romance, with the end of Red Red Wine. Aztec, Two-Step, Turandot is also another of the superbly fantastic lines in television. I've got to keep awake a bit more to photocopy and send off. I'll have to check, perhaps if I can print there. Big Block of Cheese and the incredible-ness of that constipation. The times when I wished I still could pick up and few the Super Light. It's nice to be able to un-style and make prettier the silliness of SpelChek - and it'd be nice if the button in the edit page had a tooltip worth a damn - but whatever.

Posted by subtitles at 12:28 AM | TrackBack

May 12, 2005

Very Much Like Aslan

Again with the confluence - but it is the events, rather than my them of the piecing. You'll know when you see me. And the really very very funny bits in Concrete Cow about Lion/Witch/Wardrobe - "Aslan's just going to piss you off". Oh and the reasonably promising trailer for the new Narnia movie. It makes me want to read the ones that I remember more resonantly - Dawn Treader and (Su-lin will soon inform me) the one with the iconic presence of "Under Me", or something to that effect. But I think the Dawn Treader contributes in no small extent to my affection for Golding. And I shall find the opportunity to at least try reading Starter For Ten. One of my very first spell-checked posts, how lovely. Though it's annoying in the sense that it doesn't let you manually edit straight away, and there is more than one step towards putting it all back; so I tend to just check and when it shows nothing wrong, to close it. And it finds all manner of silly things wrong, which is wrong of them and silly. And I really must do a follow up on my writing about embracing chaos - the title is handily supplied: Chaos, Control. Chaos, Control. You Like? You Like? It's probably a kind of wrong that bulimia summarises for me such a assertive sense of the will towards control. There probably really is something wrong with me going Sorkin crazy again, but at least now I'm going to fun things like doing a Mary Louise-Parker splash. And dreams about things, and my grandfather, and his death and his funeral. Very much like Aslan.

I normally like to space paragraph things, but when it's composed the way it is. And apparently Opera has decided to abdicate all responsibility. And I think I'm just a bit worn out from Optool. You really do need to restart after you first launch after updating. Klipfolio 3 will be a treat. Perhaps I should cover their striptease before the money-shot.

Posted by subtitles at 10:31 PM | TrackBack

May 10, 2005

wanton insalubriousness

Ah, so I now recover where it's from: "though it's not like I'm a drug *person*, I just *love* pot". From the West Wing pilot no less. And uttered by Bobbi Bernstein - probably due to her ability to exude wanton insalubriousness.

Posted by subtitles at 5:25 PM | TrackBack

May 9, 2005

Incredibly Camp Symmetries

I really wonder how much overlap there is between Kylie and Pet Shop Boys, since I would assume they had at least similar people working on their tours, and they would seem to inhabit similar markets. Incredibly camp followings and sensibilities both, and icons in their own right. But the symmetries are quite stunning, looking at Kylie's Showgirl tour.

Posted by subtitles at 10:45 AM | TrackBack

May 6, 2005

Murder One and Igby Goes Down

Both are now available online, so check out Murder One at Realworld starting with the pilot, and Igby Goes Down at ShareProvider. It's just because I love these both so much - I actually have them on DVD. I actually did a previous post on Igby, if you can be bothered to search for it.

Posted by subtitles at 10:51 AM | TrackBack

May 5, 2005

Jack and Bobby - That Was Seriously Cool

Albany.
...All friends shall taste
The wages of their virtue, and all foes
The cup of their deservings.- O, see, see!
Lear.
And my poor fool is hang'd!

Macbeth.
...I am in blood
Stepp'd in so far that, should I wade no more,
Returning were as tedious as go o'er.

Very much like a black hole. Oh, and the Mayor was pretty good, and rather funny. Also the splitting image.

Posted by subtitles at 10:52 AM | TrackBack

Daily Show Spin-Off

Stephen Colbert's been given a spin-off of the Daily Show, to be called the Colbert Report (co-BEAR ra-PORE). New York Times and E! via Yahoo. It'll be cool that they'll be doing a hand-off between the two shows, as they'll probably air back to back - "having Mr. Stewart, at the end of his half-hour show, share a split-screen with Mr. Colbert, in what is known in the news business as a "throw" or "toss."" Hilarity to ensue.

Posted by subtitles at 7:52 AM | TrackBack

May 4, 2005

Do *NOT* Tell Me Who Won The Snooker

I'm just starting to watch the first round of the World Snooker Championships, thanks to UKNova. It's currently over, but I know nothing, so if anyone spoils it for me, I going to give them a fucking kicking. I started watching snooker when I was in Holland, and continued when I was in York (the mentions of which, along with being tired, mask). Probably the only thing close so sport that I actually can and will watch religiously. Well, that and politics. Could anything be more boring that UK politics though? An obsession with the banal.

Posted by subtitles at 8:31 PM

May 3, 2005

Serenity Trailer in HD - Eventually

It's available on apple.com, and I'm downloading it now, but I won't be able to play it until Apple gets its act together and releases Quicktime 7 for Windows.

I'm sure it's just the trailer again anyway, but why not, it's their bandwidth. Is this not a good enough reason for a 25 Mbit downstream?

Ok, getting a bit annoying having to have enough text so the picture gets wrapped prettily.

Posted by subtitles at 4:13 PM | TrackBack

April 30, 2005

Numb3rs Needs To Get A Fucking Brain

Sabermetrics could also be used to point out where even a marginal increase in spending would benefit people the most, and where even a marginal decrease in spending would cause no effect - so the rich can get less money and the poor can get more. Of course it's based on past occurance and thus faulty, but it can assist in being a great leveller rather than a way to exclude. It can show how little it takes to nurture potential where previously there was nothing, and how any more somewhere else is just a waste of money.

And not even that much Sabrina Lloyd in the episode.

And these are the people who would otherwise say politics should stay out of science, these woolly headed eye stabbing idiots. Marching to the beat of their own lock-step.

Posted by subtitles at 9:12 PM | TrackBack

April 27, 2005

Amy Heckerling and Amy Adams - Hell Adjusts the Thermostat - The Office is Such Cack

It's just wrong that having sworn I'd never bother to watch the US version of the Office, I find out that Amy Heckerling directed the season finale, and now that Amy Adams is the "Hot Girl" in the episode. It still looks like I'll have to stab myself, but I don't think I can get around it.

Amy Heckerling most famously directed Fast Times at Ridgemont High and Clueless, while Amy Adams is one of my favorite under-discovered actresses.

I'm having to stop the episode every couple of seconds to keep myself from breaking a beer bottle over my head. Yes, oh my fucking god, if possible more annoying than the old one. Why must Amy Adams be in such cack? The woman is quite fetching as well. Jenna Fischer.

I'd like to say she's fetching such that I'd watch more of the show, but the show really is that motherfuckingly, asshole-rippingly annoying (as I've said about its predecessor) that it makes me want to burn my fucking flesh off - slowly.

Posted by subtitles at 12:34 PM | TrackBack

April 22, 2005

Twenty Thousand Streets Under The Sky

Thank blah blah for UKNova. I can't say for sure it'll be great, but so far I'm liking it more and more. It's got woman from Hex in it, one of the peripheral bitchy ones. She does well. This is the BBC site. IMDB. Seems like the director is an old hand at doing adaptations, though they refer to it via the writer/adaptor - I'm sure there's something in there to be mentioned, and has. Charming.

Posted by subtitles at 5:24 AM | TrackBack

Billie Piper on Parkinson

Sigh - Billie really is so hot isn't she? But yeah, it probably is just her body type that does what it does. A surprising amount of divorce talk - but I suppose that's probably what it was for - that's what Parky's for. A bit surreal that she was on next to Jamie Oliver. Not sure how charming she was, a bit gobby - and it really wasn't as if he was throwing softballs. Delightful scampering I must say. Now you know why I keep watching that awful show even though it's pathetically limp, written by (what I can only assume to be) a talentless ass.

Opera - opera opera opera. I'm not trying to "game" your filters, I'm just testing them out. Opera. Spell out the rules of the game in this conveniently referenced forum post.

Edit: yeah ok - sorry bout that, won't do it again.

Posted by subtitles at 3:29 AM | TrackBack

April 20, 2005

That Episode of 2.5 Men Was So Funny...

It almost makes up for how crap the season's been.
I almost peed my pants.
I'm hoarse from laughing so much.
My neighbours think a horse just moved in next door.
I had to pause it to keep from soiling the bed.
I laughed so hard I now have a headache.
I'm still chuckling as I write this.
I can't actually remember any of the funny lines.
I was sure before I checked, that it was written by the show's creators.
I tried to write a funny post that went down like a lead balloon.

Okay, that didn't come out quite as amusing as I thought it would, but trust me, it was fucking hilarious.

I can't believe though, that Janel Maloney is starring in the Amber Frey biopic, and that David Morissey is going to be in Basic Instinct 2.

Posted by subtitles at 9:54 AM | TrackBack

April 13, 2005

Blind Bochco Justice - West Wing is Best

Must say, still really liking the softly credits. And obviously this is me speaking from my huge backlog of experience, but it seems to be getting very recognisably Bochco-like.

Stoned Immaculate. West Wing is best when you've already finished most of a bottle of Bordeaux while waiting hungrily for delivery to arrive.

Posted by subtitles at 12:02 PM | TrackBack

I Heart House - that strange confluence of events

Chase downing the wine was pretty genius. And was squealing all the way through the Cameron bits. I can't get over how much I like the series, how this story arc in particular seems to have been infused with a sense of urgency and direction.

In that strange confluence of events, this episode had Missy Crider, who is Sharon Rooney from Murder One, but also was in Girls In Prison, which I watched because of Ione Skye appearing in Arrested Development. Girls in Prison is very much what convinced me of the queer genre in this stilted style is how it styles itself - along with Psycho Beach Party. PBP I now realise is very much a plot rip/homage of Gidget, which I was watching because of Beyond the Sea. Sandra Dee is remarkably like both Kate Bosworth and Lauren Ambrose. Lauren Ambrose in particular seems the red-headed self actualisation of the being-Dee. Remarkably salacious film for that era of "innocense".

Of course like all aetiological narratives, the attractive bits are rounded off by the return to order, or how the lady got her skirts or whatever. The whole confluence of narratives is particularly appealing to me - I think Girls in Prison stands out, if only for the very Lynch-esque song and Missy Crider's similarly-esque singing (speaking of which she was in Mulholland Drive). You already know about me and House, Gidget is something of a revelation, though probably mostly so because of the antecedents. Nice to see Missy Crider getting work.

Posted by subtitles at 11:41 AM | TrackBack

April 12, 2005

University Challenge Totty

They're no longer selling Diet Vanilla Coke at the Cold Storage at Bugis - it's a sign I tell you. Woman on University Challenge from the one women's college in Oxford is such hottie. Name of Kane from Glasgow, sort of Jennifer Connelly like, less long faced. I'm in the wrong band. I don't think she even buzzed in for a starter once, the daft cow. She provided really about one answer for the bonuses that I could tell. Totty.

Louis cleaned his floor, showered, and changed his sheets. What's wrong with me?

This is her wide-eyed and surprised - otherwise she looked a bit sleepy.

Posted by subtitles at 6:45 AM | TrackBack

April 11, 2005

The Huge Renaissance That is BBC Digital

I don't really have that much to say about it, but it's produced some serious quality television. Even if only Smoking Room and Shameless, it'd be worth it. Ideal wasn't bad, and I'd have though Peep Show is from there as well. According to Bex was a bit silly, but quantity is a virtue, especially when the quality isn't quite as bad or as mawkish as other national televisions. Of course a number of these were cross pollinated to terrestrial, but overall, they seem very much engendered by the desire for digital movement. Am I wrong, or is 3 comedy and 4 drama? Whatever the case, I don't quite see the same volume or quality from any of the other channels. And they do draw from an - admittedly small and incestuous - but nicely talented bunch.

Posted by subtitles at 11:47 PM | TrackBack

Grey's Anatomy - Masturbation is usually done alone for a reason - L-Chunky

And so Grey's Anatomy can actually be better, I assume once they get a bit further away from the stilted fuckers who actually concieved the series - much like Dead Like Me, which I think back on fondly now it's gone. Aptly because Mason appears in the episode, looking skeezier(?) than usual. But why oh why why why, does it have to resolve in such a trite, achingly middle-brow, "emotionally instructive" and upbeat manner? Masturbation is usually done alone for a reason.

And why did they have to make the pretty blonde one the most sentimental chest clasping one? Such a waste of Katherine Heigl doing well. Sandra Oh is doing better with me though. Many many signs pointing to how it might get better, especially them moving in to the house, probably the most enjoyable portion of the episode. I just hope it doesn't take on too much from its lead-in. Apparently Boston Legal got elbowed in favour of further pimping the series. The will-they won't they thing isn't awful, neither was Mason planting one.

L Word was pretty sweet this week, and Jenny looks better in the short hair, brings out the shape of her face - which is my way of saying it makes her look chunkier - in the good way.

Posted by subtitles at 3:24 PM | TrackBack

PopWorld - Concrete Cow - Miquita Oliver

I'm sure I appreciate PopWorld too much. Miquita I'm sure I find alluring in that very totty way. I really need to find a game that's worth playing. Tarty Doris.com has a bunch of pictures of Miquita. Very shapely thighs, is what I'm saying. Very flattering top here. A good example of how attractive heft can be. Overall I must say it's my favorite pop show on UK tv - they do much better live performances, even if they do rely that much on the washed out look; and they do nice nonsense interviews. Fun Shirley and Bjork.

I realise they (not Popworld) like to use the word cack - presumably since they can't say shit. But Concrete Cow is really rather good - especially with the very fine players from Smoking Room/Peepshow. I got it off UKNova - I find the idea of linking there a bit Pyrrhic, since unless you have a user account, you're up the creek; and if you did, you should understand what the search function is for, and be actively using their really rather innovative RSS feed.

And by the way, a bunch of definitions of G - as in, I assume, 'you ain't no G'.

Edit: It should surprise no one that this post is suddenly very high in the search results for the phrase "miquita oliver" - it's the most searched for unique phrase in my stats, and I'm on the first page of results for Yahoo. But if you want pictures, I recommend Tarty Doris from above, and if you want to download PopWorld to ogle, you'll have to get to UKNova when they're open for new members, otherwise you're out of luck.

Posted by subtitles at 2:08 AM | TrackBack

April 9, 2005

Upon a Thread

And so the mania never goes away, the crushing anxiety, the confused blinded panic, the twitch of summary anger.

Posted by subtitles at 7:01 AM | TrackBack

April 8, 2005

Maybe Baby - Melinda and Melinda/FF Trailer - Virtual Sexuality

Maybe Baby was absolute trash. It's not that Hugh Laurie isn't funny, or Joely Richardson isn't in need of Poliakoff to make her interesting - it's just absolutely fucking dire. Made me want to chuck things at the tv. Gives self-reflexive writing a bad name and uses the thing within the thing thing like he *wants* to make me strangle him. Matthew Macfadyen wasn't awful.

The trailer for Melinda and Melinda is absolutely awful, and Will Ferrell is particularly retch-inducing. It doesn't even look funny.

And how were the cast of Virtual Sexuality ever supposed to have played teenagers? I still can't believe she was Door.

And not that Jessica Alba doesn't look nice in it, but FF looks really fucking awful.

Posted by subtitles at 7:59 PM | TrackBack

April 7, 2005

The Tribe

What is it that Poliakoff does, that shrouds his actors in this swathe of gravitas - he just seems able to bring out of them what he does. Anna Friel makes me feel funny in my pants - and she's more successful than I ever thought her capable of. And Jeremy Northam seems to be yet another projection of the director. Joely Richardson I think I'm most surprised by, in many ways this is her Igby Goes Down, though I can't say I've seen enough of her to hate her like Jeff Goldblum. Anna Friel will have me looking out for her in GBH, and the coincidence of her being in a film called Perfect Strangers. And I'm getting Virtual Sexuality, which is probably where the ass who spoilt Spooks is so familiar from - which also has Laura Fraser, who - oh my god - was Door in Neverwhere: now available on DVD.

Posted by subtitles at 9:15 PM | TrackBack

April 4, 2005

The Troubadour in American Network Television

That's what season 2 Scrubs is for. Colin Hay at the beginning of the season premiere, My Overkill. I'll say again that Scrubs uses music, in not the most subtly, the most effectively of the series I see on TV. It's really not series, like most, where you dread the dreariness that is their montage sequences to music. I got his album - I surmised that a good amount of it appeared during the season. Colin Hay - Man At Work.rar

I've lost steam, but the Troubadour (a different one) appears rather prominently in Gilmore Girls, and particularly deliciously with Mr. Rosso from Freaks and Geeks. Music similarly of great importance, but more in the reference than in the use. Good theme tune though.

Posted by subtitles at 10:39 PM | TrackBack

Luvvie Without Being Annoying - Lesbians

Yeah, okay, they really decided to run with the whole thing of Jenny (Mia Kirsher) being likable this season, no longer the one you want to strangle - and not in the fun way. They also manage to dress her very fetchingly, luvvie without being annoying. I think I keep using lesbians in my titles in a rather untoward manner, but well. Jenny and new girl do well together. I wonder what's the whole thing with controlling lesbians, especially those with lots of financial and emotional power.

iheartmonkeys monkeysgotufty mebiting biffing

Posted by subtitles at 9:35 PM | TrackBack

Ione Skye and Alan Tudyk - Smokers are People Too - Sketch Show Lame

Oh my god it's Ione Skye!!! not to mention Alan Tudyk! Yay for the cameos, pity about the show. And yes, quite rightly she's such a hottie - for people who don't know, she was the object of desire in Say Anything, which I'm sure destroyed her career. I hope there's much more of her soon, and not on crap shows. She really is heartbreaking, and more fragile with age. I feel like such a camp admirer. Not much of a part for Alan Tudyk, but sort of fun.

More and more lame Sketch Show is - honestly hasn't been much good since the pilot - surely they can't have run out of ideas that fast. The women do much better than the men.

But if you need a fantastic show to watch, and think smokers are people too, you haven't experienced the best that BBC digital has to offer, which is Smoking Room. I've only seen it on UKNova, and the rips aren't phenomenal, but it's a fantastic series, and you'd be a fool not to see it. Has the arsey guy from Peep Show, doing a much better version of himself in this one. Nicely written, and makes me want to smoke so bad. The players in these series really do seem rather incestuous, I suppose it's more understandable living it. Pity the pilot featuring someone from Smoking Room is the worst of the lot. I hope they upload the Christmas Special eventually.

Oh my god, I never quite realised that Ione Skye used to be married to a Beastie Boy! And I suppose she was sort of working steadily, if not prominently.

Posted by subtitles at 8:25 PM | TrackBack

Grey's Anatomy - Oh Fuck Me.

Okay, to be fair, I really like Katherine Heigl, she's just so much more expressive and attractive than the rest of the cast - and funny guy similarly has a lot of potential. But oh my fucking god the fucking drama. At least the first part of the pilot was funny. I was already going to say, that having watched Scrubs season 2 again, that the medical drama side of things, the specifics of this fictionalised diegesis of medicine - as much as hobbits and Jedi - can so easily end up being a self-diddling indulgence. As if masturbation isn't repetitive enough.

The problem with Grey's is that fine, it also tries to move beyond the medical (/fantastic), but that portion of it really isn't any good either. Compound that with the dreadful drama and politics of cine, and you get me stabbing myself like it's fun. And so much of the cast are annoying as fuck - especially the main character. Casting directors or whoever, invest far too much worth in "interesting" looking people. It's the disease of peroxo-boy and what made me underestimate Rena Sofer.

It's so telling that the most fun bit was probably funny guy and Katherine Heigl getting their rejoice on. And the non-core cast of drama are really very bored now. Oh and the writing is positively dreadful - what would be really scary is if whoever wrote it actually thought it was sincere, and if it is, oh my the scary. I'm a writer now, I get to say it - they should be shot. I'm not saying I'm going to stop watching it, but they're going to have to seriously shape up, and find some way to make it as much about surgery as Charlies Angels was about Law Enforcement.

Posted by subtitles at 6:12 PM | TrackBack

March 31, 2005

Brideshead - the House of Blind Justice Sticks

There's always something special about watching the beginning of Brideshead. I think I don't even quite remember the novel quite as well as I do the series. Regardless, it does well, as far as I'm concerned, or at least I think so, watching the beginning again. It's now available where you'd expect it to be, or not. But regardless, here.

I wish I could talk about them at length every week, but I like Blind Justice and House. House in particular of course, but Blind Justice is doing well, and as always, I'm even more well corrected into liking Rena Sofer. So it's only with peroxo-boy that striking looks gets in the way of talent. I really need to do a real search for some talent when it comes to making up titles.

Oh, and Life on a Stick is still a bit too gaggy, but all in all still pretty funny, sticking with it.

Posted by subtitles at 12:19 PM | TrackBack

March 30, 2005

La Forza Del Destino

How much more wrenchingly awful can the diegesis that Shameless presents get? Which is to say that it's a wonderful series, and moving. Unfortunately RealWorld doesn't have the best rips, for that you'll have to get lucky with UKNova. The performers, and their performances, are wonderful.

I really can't quite get over how subtly and joyfully moving it is, just the montage of Lip in his newfound sanctuary of his own improvement, and Debbie's little shop and evasion. I can't believe I held off for this long. I suppose I just expected it to not be as good. Apparently some people know better.

Posted by subtitles at 2:12 PM | TrackBack

March 29, 2005

the great romance of the 20th century

The feeling of things happening while you're not there, after you come back. And this is so important, I feel can't stress it enough, and I'm clinging not to forget. It's peculiar, people looking at you 'you're back', and going off. Newfound confidence all round, place not having burnt to the ground. It's disappointing. It makes you wish you were all alone in the world unhappy. I'm resentful, for we're strangers when we meet. TV warming up in the cold.

I'm watching comedy connections now, and the goodness gracious me, and there's something tremendously sad about it, but then so many thing are when you wake up at midnight. In a sense in seems that you never quite got to glimpse at all the incredibly intellectual and eloquent people that participated, if only because the discourse they were stuck in precluded that - made it middle-brow. In the way you never quite got with the public school boys doing comedy. And perhaps as much if not more so than the Beatles, Monty Python is the great romance of the 20th century.

Posted by subtitles at 6:12 PM | TrackBack

March 28, 2005

Grey's Anatomy Pilot

The drama doesn't help. Funny-guy is funny. Katherine Heigl is fun. For a pilot, it's not bad. Central character isn't as bad as she looked she would be. Oh, ok, now you get that they should have just stuck to the comedy - the drama sucks ass. And annoying woman who wasn't being so annoying? Annoying again. If not for Katherine Heigl and funny guy, this would really suck. And bitchy chinese one - it's nice they're trying something original. So yes, stick to the funny. You'd think it'd only get better.

Posted by subtitles at 12:31 PM | TrackBack

March 27, 2005

Swansong - LAX, Medical Investigation - Life On A Stick and Sucking

It's a bit wrong, but watching the swansong episodes of LAX is making me miss it a bit. It really wasn't as bad as it initially allowed itself to be - I'm hoping I didn't just summarily delete them all, though I probably did. If it comes to that I could always get it here. Louis is sentimental that way.

Which explains the twinge (slight) at the end (pretty much) of Medical Investigation. I'm not sure if Susanna Thompson quite made up for Peroxo-boy being dissolute *yet* again. But I've always liked Sasha Barese, and still to this day hold out hope that I'll be able to find Run of the House.

Life on a Stick isn't awful - the unaired pilot was leaked as Related by Family, and it's supposedly by Mel Gibson's production company. Thankfully the change of title might mean they reconsidered putting too much emphasis on the family bits. Step-sister is quite comely though. Evil boss is pretty wrong, as are so many other things. We'll see how things go.

Posted by subtitles at 7:48 PM | TrackBack

I fart puckabees (what do you want from me?)

And so much biting. Naomi Watts is lovely. And she's good. She either gets the better lines, or she just does them better. Film is an absolute load of annoying me. Another strand of american masturbation that makes me wish I owned a baseball bat. But really Naomi Watts seems to be able to really carry off that very deft being of faffy and sincere. Nice lookin' too. Have I said it's annoying? Granted the activism is meant to be more or less peripheral, but there's this mallet and tongs and a sign that hits you on the head.

It's just disappointing that smart intellectual people seem absolutely incapable of getting out of their political lockstep - from Tracey Emin to Morrissey, it's all blah blah blag blag, no nuance, no complexity, just justification and buttress like a tree. It's like an inability to think, encouraged by this bent educational echo chamber. I look forward to shouting.

For whatever reason, webcam is broken in the latest leaked builds of MSN.

It appears to have something to do with scrolling in IE while video is playing - I think I shall disable smooth scrolling and remove IE from my list of optool browsers.

Posted by subtitles at 1:35 PM | TrackBack

Oh My God Is There No Escape From Countdown

I wonder what is more interesting to me, the fact that people post Countdown, that I downloaded it to watch, or that it's broadcast in HDTV. They posted it because it was an 8 year old kid who appeared in 3 shows, presumably winning twice. It's not quite as fun when you're not baked, but it's okay. Not the worst thing I could watch, I'll give it that. But also very very wrong. You do realise I'm going to end up watching Dr. Who for Billie don't you?

Well that explains what happened to Mel C. Still quite fetching isn't she? And Avril is similarly fetching - though it might just be washed out look the show seems to go for.

Posted by subtitles at 10:39 AM | TrackBack

March 26, 2005

"the office" - absolutely gut-wrenchingly motherfuckingly assholerippingly bitchfacedly awful

Again I'm surprised that I never wrote about it when I first watched it, but there you go. I'm sitting here, watching what I didn't finish watching of this cycle of Sports Night, and it occurs to me I've never told you how absolutely gut-wrenchingly motherfuckingly assholerippingly bitchfacedly awful The Office is. And just to be clear, I don't mean that the American version is bad while I would gladly give the UK version head. I'd rather be raised by my left testicle up a flagpole while imagining that over-enunciating anti-biotics is clever.

Anyone who lauds any or either is going to have me mocking them to their face like the cockmunching intellectual midgets that they are. If I'm not wrong I might have written about how the opening titles alone of 6 feet under can make me want to stab myself - and so the title song of the office makes me want to turn green wearing pants.

American comedy is often deeply and endlessly flawed - SNL in particular epitomises all that is wrong with american comedy, and after watching Mean Girls, I think Tina Fey should be shot - slowly. All this is nothing to the fact that american comedy presumes to itself that it can transpose comedy. But when you compound that sick fancy with the inability to discern what is absolutely gut-wrenchingly motherfuckingly assholerippingly bitchfacedly awful, you get a glimpse into why there are times when you think american comedy should be left on an island with a gun containing only one bullet.

It's an awful show. Why would I want to watch something that even in the original was offensive, pathetic, masturbatingly contrived, and - wait for it - about as vaguely amusing as a poke in the eye. Watching it made me want to hit things. Honestly, to the people I know who admit watching it to me - I will fuck you up.

Posted by subtitles at 5:12 PM | TrackBack

March 24, 2005

They're Going to Make Bartlett Vice-President

I'm not saying I'm going to go and watch MASH right this minute, but Alan Alda is good at what he does. But yes, I now know it for a fact that they're going to have the former/sitting president be the nominee for the Vice Presidency, as Clinton teased. It would help the next season in so many ways, most important of which is that Martin Sheen would have carte blanche to recur. It would explain Santos' win, and it would make it easier for all of the cast to stay the same.

Now obviously none of this is true - they wouldn't do it just because it'd cross the line, even for the, in terms of stunt politics - it would rob them of a meaningful debate by the start of next season between the two candidates; which would allow them, again, to dig deep into the ideology of how even at its best, the Republicans are going to get pwn3d by the Democrats. I wonder if they brought Bruno back to prove a point, and whether no one on the regular cast would talk to him.

So yeah, they realised that they need really strong episodes to end out the season, so break's over. Good episode. I hope Mary Louise Parker appears again. Oh, and clarification on nummy status - supposedly Jennifer Connelly is marriagable material and endlessly sweet and heartbreaking, rather than out and out nummy. Though Career Oppurtunities might cause that to be revised.

Posted by subtitles at 4:10 PM | TrackBack

March 23, 2005

The Way I'm Most Comfortable With

So yes, the Andorians are really cute, and having watched one of the few Enterprise episodes that I unreservedly like, I must say they are one of creations of the series that I think entirely successful. I'm sure the episode wouldn't be quite as resonant if you didn't watch the one about P'Jem first, but I remember this episode serving well, even when I first watched it. It makes me think it might actually be worth it to watch the Andorian episode in season 3, even though that's the season that quality forgot. I can't quite explain why I'm watching early seasons of Enterprise when I could be watching say the Shameless that I haven't yet, or even Spaced or My Life in Film again. Perhaps I find the simplicity of their guile-less representations comforting. I wonder whether the misdirection, or lack of, in the Stigma epsisode, is an alienating part of their insidious liberal agenda.

Speaking of which, Daily Show's been good the past few days, I think they respond well to crap being hefted. I'm sure you realise I just can't bring myself to respond to certain kinds of crap when it gets saturated, my previous post to this one covers at least one of the pertinent events in the way I'm most comfortable with. I don't know if it was Billy Campbell listening to Debaser that set it off, but I've been cramping up my hand trying to get down Here Comes Your Man and Headache.

I can't help but say that Enterprise isn't very good, even though I like it enough to watch it - and it'd help if my season 2 rips were worth a damn - this must have been back in the day when FOV and SFM were still ripping in analog - yikes. The Daily Show, and House for that matter, was good for my rage. I promise, I really will fuck them up.

Posted by subtitles at 5:23 PM | TrackBack

Isn't House Wonderful? - I underestimate Rena Sofer's appeal

They must really have had the backs up - they're pulling out all the stops, using the notes and running. The thing between him and Cameron is unbelievably good, and the rest of the cast is really showing off rather well - especially Cuddy and RSL. They represent commercialism is the most crass manner possible, and I think they mistake the person for the ideal, and they have no conception of what 'Good Management' is. I can't say enough about how good a series this is, and how much you should be watching it as opposed to other crap (you know what I'm talking about). But the actor isn't bad.

And So Definitive Guide to getting House. Torrents found here, get them while they're still seeded. The rest you'll have to get via Donkey, here.

If you put any faith in my sense of taste, and ability to smell, shower or not, watch it - and why not? Often enough it comes on after American Idol.

Oh, and Blind Justice is becoming more and more watchable, there are many good things about it. I underestimate Rena Sofer's appeal, and I actually really really like the titles. And it's unashamed of just being a cop show. At the moment, everything's still available.

Posted by subtitles at 11:22 AM | TrackBack

March 21, 2005

Omnibus, With Lesbians - Go Down - Opera Search

Burr Steers does good work. Apparently he's decided to really embrace the whole of the camp potential they've been going for. Really brought things out of the people - Bette being an ass. He's good. I'm sure I'll never quite get over Igby Goes Down.

I think I've come a bit tired of writing like this, part of me is really starting to think that I need to do some real work and finish something - I'm not going to be that guy who writes short stories - that's just silly like floral curtains.

Opera search is rather fine - it uses Overture, which I'm not sure how to differentiate from yahoo, but the searches aren't identical. Regardless I've decided that I should use it as default, the MSN butterfly isn't *that* pretty. If nothing else, it doesn't seem to include ads at the moment, which is nice - they probably don't expect massive traffic, but the layout is reasonably pretty, and it's by a brand I like, so why not.

Posted by subtitles at 4:00 PM | TrackBack

March 16, 2005

House - Rescued from CSI

That was a rather superlatively good episode of House I just watched. It was written by Lawrence Kaplow, who's apparently written quite a few of the episodes of House that I think are very very good. The director Randall Zisk is also a familiar name, but to not so much that I remember him, nor is his long filmography *that* striking. But my it was a good episode. New nemesis is good - very very amped up presentation of the premises of the show, more drama than usual - you can tell it's the beginning of a new story arc from having had more episodes ordered. No end of interesting, knowing more about the production process and the way the episodes have to be batched.

Nina from 24 was the patient, good guest stars always raise the game. But yes, Lawrence Kaplow makes me now want to watch Hack, which I hope I can find somewhere. But apparently not. And thankfully they've rescued Baba O'Riley from CSI. Also the mentions of control and shame are really rather good in the presentation of Bulemia - I really liked it. Cameron was good in the episode as well, heartrending vulnerability does that, aussie boy was fine, Omar Epps is still annoying.

I will burn House DVDs for anyone who promises to stop watching DP.

Posted by subtitles at 4:11 PM | TrackBack