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January 28, 2004

The Rest

Doesn't anyone else just think John Kerry is a boring pathetic prune? Why is it that I don't trust Clark, much less John Edwards? There is just that suspicion of insincerity and avoidance that you get in the eyes of most of these candidates, Dean being the exception. Look at them at moments of private publicity and you see the shadow leavening their hidden guilt and shame. They all have their politician smiles. The conflict in Dean seems so much more of a felt one, of where speaking the truth goes beyond the pale.

The theme of this, as it was in Twin Peaks, has to be reversal - where the civil war of self, and the imposition on self flap.

Dean is a orator of conviction and moves me. He is a man of humour and intellect. John Kerry couldn't excite Louis Theroux. You'd wish someone who talked the talk so convincingly and resonates that feeling so palpably would do better, as he will.

Why do I feel that all the rest are just running?

Posted by subtitles at 2:51 AM | Personal

January 26, 2004

Let's Photograph a Barn

Aside from a general feeling of unease, discomfort and overall worry, I can't say I'm particularly happy. I haven't written at all since. It would be a kind favour if everything went smoothly and things didn't get butternut shaped so quickly or so adversely.

Perhaps I'm looking for my own reversal of the Civil War.

Howard Dean was not angry, he was not displaying any particular loss of control except the melancholy exuberance you get from that twinging of defeat. He just strikes me as someone who speaks his mind and is so envelopingly sincere. Wesley Clark probably wouldn't be the worst candidate, but he doesn't give me that sense - that sense of unequivocal belief in the will to be conscientious and work to the fulfillment of belief.

I just watched a bunch of people who wouldn't - I'd rather think couldn't - see the barn. Anger had no part in it.

Posted by subtitles at 3:52 AM | Personal

January 8, 2004

The Overnet Mystery

So well it does seem that pausing items has an adverse effect on my downstream. The strange thing is that it doesn't seem to be directly related. Now that my downstream is back to 70+, it's not like it's those I unpause that are the main contributors. I suppose though, that I should wait overnight to see if this uptick remains consistent.

So yes, perplexing, another thing to add to the list of Overnet/Donkey mojo's I abase myself to in the search for consistently maxing out my connection.

Posted by subtitles at 12:50 AM | Computer Stuff

January 6, 2004

Overnet and RDF

I get the feeling my hypothesis about Overnet has been borne out. My download speeds have been horrific over the holiday period, when I presume more people are home and actually downloading stuff. Most likely many people either don't know/don't care that their clients might be starting up with windows and been sharing 24/7 when they're done downloading. Whatever it is, my downstream is back to the way it should be and that's rather grand - now it just falls to see whether I can pause downloads and not have that affect my downstream.

It's become a kind of tradition of mine to watch the MacWorld or whatever Steve Jobs keynotes - and the reality distortion field is very much still in place. What can they be thinking, making the iPod mini only about $50 less than the low level iPod? If their intent is to make that low level model more attractive I can see it, but it perplexes me nonetheless. I suppose they need room to drop the price as time goes on.

Those celebrity endorsements are really starting to piss me the fuck off. These are idle people with too much money, not very much know-how, and are sheep of the worst kind. Apple really is just selling the lie of a better lifestyle.

Spend money on something you're going to use more than once a year, Opera for instance - more fun every day :P. Or, well, educate linux users on how, *ahem*, windows software isn't exactly not free either.

Posted by subtitles at 2:04 PM | Computer Stuff

January 4, 2004

Reality

I suppose a couple of significant things have occured for me in the last 24hrs or so. Well perhaps not Important, but striking nonetheless.

I was up till 7 in the morning watching Michael Moore's 'Roger and Me' - and while I might have just been in one of my overly sentimental moods as I can tend to be that late at night, I found it incredibly moving. And despite a broader picture of economics calling out to the rational part of my mind, the depiction of devastation and in a real sense the personal and human tragedy that attends to it - the unwillingness of parties to make even the smallest show of claiming responsibility, of recognising the human cost of their decisions, makes me want to make a bonfire out of issues of the Economist. The casual dismissal of human degradation that the film depicts is appalling to the extent that my self-consciousness about my own outrage at it becomes almost laughable.

I've also been watching the Democratic debates that are now leading up to the Iowa caucus. And while only Lieberman can present anything approaching an intelligent way of selling free trade, Dean is a stunningly charismatic orator. You really get a sense of how he has such self assurance in the integrity of his pragmatic beliefs, especially when he talks about health care, and when he talks about the will towards honesty.

Of equal import is that I sat through the majority of a marathon session of Real World Las Vegas. Brynn is rather comely - most of the rest are really rather funny, or perhaps just dumb and boring. Frank is impressive in his own way, in the way he handles people and the way he comments on himself and others.

Also there has just been "Faking It Changed My Life", and a lovely revisiting of some of the favorite people from that first series, the chef, the cellist, the jockey, the bouncer. The chef wants to become a writer and I can't help but feel warm feelings towards his self-effacing manner and his will towards aspiration - ambivalent beckett quotes notwithstanding.

And here is the load of tripe article of the day, such a lot of utter fear/guilt mongering that makes you want to slap people. The CDFreaks article links to the original gall.

Posted by subtitles at 9:02 PM | Personal